F.R.I.E.N.D.S

I have always been an emotional person. And it affected my choice of friends. I would always be comfortable around similar individuals, one who kept family above themselves, one who empathized with the miseries of everyone.

When I look back in time, I have carried my friendships with me, heavily investing in them, with the results that (touch-wood), I have a set of fantastic individuals as friends.

Today when I woke up I thought it was important for me to talk about my friends from the three most important stages of my life: School, IIT, and ISB. While there are many other friends, but I came close to them only outside these three stages. So here goes:

School: I was a very complicated kid. I had my insecurities, my reservations, and my inferiority complex. I was a no-body wanting to be someone, and even I didn’t know who that someone was. I don’t think I was well liked, and that further fuelled my angst against the world. It was here that two individuals changed my world-view:

Rishu: If there was a lesson in humility I would want my kids to take, it would be from him. He is grounded, God fearing, hard-working Family Guy. Had the best of times with him, while I lived a dual life fighting my complexes. I owe a lot of good times to him.

Varun: Varun was living my dream. I distinctly remember wanting to be him. He was smart, suave and charming: Girls loved him. He finally achieved the impossible, turning me into a confident individual. With him I felt invincible. It was a team of two and we hardly needed anyone. I was Shashwat with him and that to me was priceless.

IIT: When I entered IIT, I developed something strange within me. I became over-confident and arrogant. May be it was because I was dating a good looking girl, while studying at the best college, or may be it was a result of being non-existent throughout my earlier life. It was here that I met three very contrasting individuals who grounded me in their own ways and fashioned a better human being out of me.

Piyush: Piyush was the guy I took for granted. I blindly trusted him and knew he would never say no to me. But slowly and steadily he endeared me into being an individual who would be the “Piyush” to lot of other friends. If ever my friends have thought of me as dependable, I owe it to him. He is just the most fantastic friend one can ever dream of having.

Bhan: Bhan is someone I earlier envied. He would hardly study but ace everything that came his way. Slowly during the journey, he lifted me up as I took control of my grades. I even depended on him for teaching me subjects, which he was not enrolled in. I expected him to remember all he studied in the past semester, just so that he could teach me. And he never refused. Another friend, who would never say No. One of the few friends I have with whom I would not blink before asking for a favour. Today Bhan is a changed man. He is much mature and a darling of our group.

Amit: He was a person I would share all my frustrations with. We had an amazing time doing just about anything, from playing tennis to discussing girls on campus. We were each others wingman. Time would just fly in his company.

ISB:By the time I came to ISB, I was much more focused and grounded. And I had decided to let nothing come in the way of my goals. “There is no time to make friends”, I would tell myself. But boy was I wrong. I met three people, each of whom helped me achieve what I did at ISB.

Arpita: I never thought I could be friends with her. She was a little too popular for that. I cannot recollect how we became friends, but I can safely say that we became friends for life. Arpi, was the only constant in my life at ISB. She had seen my high and lows, and been there. We are the most different individuals and yet we never expected each other to change. We had most fun just reveling in pure, child like humor. I would go as far as saying that even she would not have shared as much with anyone as she has shared with me. Knowing her as much as I do, I can safely say that she would do something that would make all of us proud. She is destined to do it.

Kaushal: I gave him the name Coco and am proud of it  Coco was my biggest critic. He would be my go to person, if I wanted an unbiased expert opinion about anything. I felt he knew what I wanted better than even I did. I still remember when I didn’t get into McK, BCG he smiled and said “Now I am happy, you were not meant to be at these places”. Had the most awesome tea conversations with him. Coco, always wants himself to believe that he is strong, but get him drunk and you’d know that he is still a child, wanting his parents to be proud of him, looking for a nice girl to get settled with. I really respect him for following his heart, and wish in all earnest that he achieves what he set out to achieve.

Shobhit: I remember feeling sad when Shobhit told me that he got an admission offer from IIM Bangalore. The though of losing him made me shiver. Studying was so much fun when it was with him. We would study for half and hour and then get lost in meaningless conversation for an hour. People around us would get frustrated, but we thoroughly enjoyed the experience. The fact that we were similar in our goals, made it so much easier to stay focused amidst all negativity. We always greet each other with “Kya macha rahe ho!” I hope we always have a ready answer for that.

Confessions of a serial womanizer!

Warning : Based on a fictitious character. Any resemblance is purely coincidental

Ok, let me confess I love women. They have a very endearing ability of making every small problem big and every big problem very small. So you’ll see them cribbing about how you should go to a doctor if all you have is common cold, on the other hand they’ll ask you to relax every time you flunk an exam, lose your latest gadget or your job. Women bring a certain quality to the conversation which makes it very smooth. They compliment men and complete us in a way no man dog or horse can. They calm us; help us realize that money is not always the answer, that relationships are important, that love can solve every problem. It is very important to have women in your life. None of us can imagine our life without our mother, and our sisters. But once we grow up we feel the need to go out and explore the world, we are no longer comfortable sharing our views, our thoughts with our mother or sister. So we look out for friends, friends who can understand listen or care for us in the same way as our mother or sister did. The relation is not the same, it may be on an absolutely different level but the need is the same. The only glitch is like there is no perfect man, there is no perfect woman, consequently one can never find all the qualities in one woman, so I talk to a different one every week. I find my answers through different women. One might complete my need to be heard, while one might complete me physically. Have we ever complained about having more than one sister, or more than one uncle or aunt? It’s because each of them understands us at a different level. We need each one of them to feel complete, to be fully understood at all levels. One might think that I take advantage of them and do what suits my convenience, but the truth is that if we think that a woman doesn’t understand a man’s intention we are insulting her intelligence. They understand us much better than we understand them, and one can never establish any relationship with them, without their permission. It’s like a gift they have. So stop thinking of women as some stupid species that all and sundry take advantage of. They are much more intelligent that we give them credit for.
So please people I beg of you, let me live in peace and enjoy the wonderfulness of the company of a woman

Brevity is the soul of wit

We speak too much. Every time anybody asks us any question we answer in the most complicated manner, we fill it with so many words that the other person ceases to understand the logic. Is it true, that simple means common and complex means esoteric? We all read, understand and appreciate quotes. They have so much to say, in so little words, yet when it comes to expressing ourselves we rely on endless gibberish. The most witty, crisp yet penetrating comments are always short. The other day I was reading a man’s review on Saawariya, Sanjay Leela Bhansali’s magnum opus. It summed up everything in just one line “ Sanjay Bhansali did the impossible, he made a boring ‘blue’ film”. I thought the effect this had on me was much more than thousand word reviews written by other critics. Why is it that we believe in complicating things? Writers of the yore used to believe in writing for the masses. Never did they use complicated words, yet they brought out the emotions beautifully, the characters were understated yet effective.
Pretense has become the order of the day, we have all sorts of rules with fancy names, pyramid rule, the five point theory , et al , essentially what they say is simple but of course they are garnished with the fanciest words and logic. Both students and teachers alike dig at them.
What the end result of all this is that people who know the art of simplicity are lost amidst all the chaos in the name of the complex. They are considered dumb, or plainly stupid, while self assuming Einstein(s) of the world enjoy endless admiration from dumb witted people who have no clue of what they heard or read.
One can only hope that some sanity is restored, the content is given its importance, and that people recognize substance over style. I hope against hope. May be some day the world will again be simple, we’ll again learn to smile and laugh freely, not have any pretensions. May be just may be…!

Feeling Blue!!

01/01/08
As another new day dawns upon me I wonder what's so different about today. Why does it seem so different from yesterday. Why does eternity separate the two. Yesterday was beautiful, today is gloomy, yesterday was 2007 today is 2008, yesterday was anticipation, today is the day, yesterday was forests and wilderness today is a dingy compartment. So as I prepare myself for the journey called life, I want to answer the all important question, Why isn't the time after the meal as good as the wait. Why do we feel all kicked 'bout celebrating the new year but once it's on us we feel low. Why do we find it so hard to come to terms with the 'morrow. The reason is that we never expect the future to be as good as the past, we're scared of ageing, we feel something in us is killed every second. When I look outside the train I see life moving so fast and so away from me. Then there are stoppages asking me to relax and then the train speeds up again . Then one moment it'll stop and not move, it'll be the end of the journey, the so called destination and then eons later it will be time to board another train, may be as another being. Till then let us all find time to smell the flowers once in a while, look at the sky, the stars, the moon, let us not run so fast lest we reach the destiny too soon!!

31st December 2006

Festive season is here. A reason to smile, a reason to celebrate. The wind has a certain niceness to it. The stars beam with all the glory. Another year coming to an end, another "new" year to look forward to, new resolutions, new relations, another step to the inevitable. Last year was easily the most eventful year of my life. It had everything from stupid fights,extreme happiness, extreme sorrow to moments of highest of highs. It started on the 31st Dec 2006. It was a very significant day in terms of what it represented, a bad fight and the beginning of a new relation which almost defines me at this moment. I can still remember that day vividly, when I was roaming around, looking for acceptance, while all my dear friends where trying to make it special for me. Piyush one of my closest friend was calling everyone and anyone to see if he could get me into the best party for the New Year. But it was hardly the consolation that I needed. I had a fight with a very dear friend. It was something unwarranted, but yet something extremely important to do. I was feeling down all through the day and was waiting for something to calm me, someone to make me feel better. The same very moment I got a call wishing me Happy New Year. I was ecstatic, it meant everything to me. It was God sent. It was from a friend I had just found, thanks to the social networking site called orkut. Those two minutes of conversation brought back the smile on my lips. I was looking forward. I knew some special script was being written up there, and it definitely had a happy ending. Almost a year later, I have understood the game. The fight was inevitable, it was important for the birth of a new relation, a relation which was worth all the fights, a relation which was worth all the lows ,all the red-herrings. A relation which is here to stay for eternity. The relation with MY GOD. Amen!

Love Vs Lust

Both Love and Lust begin with the same letter L, used interchangeably in almost all relationship, I set out to discover the differences between the two. What is amazing is that how we tend to worship true love and all that jazz, but cleverly bypass the feeling of lust that tends to engulf us all the time. Some of the differences between the two that came to my mind were:
- Love is temporary, Lust is permanent
- Love is fickle, Lust is stable
- Love has no boundaries, Lust is restricted.
- Love is a Utopian concept, Lust is the most real of all emotion
- Love can be deceptive, Lust never deceives
- Love never needs a reason, Lust craves for one.
- We rarely fall in love, we lust everyday
- We need to discover love, Lust discovers us.
Love is a fleeting emotion. It is very difficult for an individual to love the same person forever, it is doubly difficult to love more than one person and it is impossible to live without love. Lust simplifies life. It is unpretentious and uncomplicated!

All about records!!

Just yesterday while I was glancing through the newspaper, I read articles showering much deserved praises on Dada and Yuvraj for their scintillating knocks against Pakistan. One thing caught my attention was the list of the records that were made. One of the records made was It was the first 300 runs partnership by TWO LEFT HANDED BATSMEN against PAKISTAN in INDIA. Wow, I thought to myself, we people are really obsessed with numbers and records. This record made no sense to me at all. Isn't everything a record if we keep on narrowing it down. Suppose a batsman made 4 runs against Pakistan in Bangalore , then it might be the first 4 runs in 8 balls against Pakistan, if not then it will most probably be the first 4 runs in 8 balls against Pakistan in Bangalore, if not then it will definitely be the first 4 runs in 8 balls against Pakistan in Bangalore in 12.5 minutes. How does it matter. Navjot Singh Sidhu with his characteristic wry sense of humour once remarked "Statistics are like bikinis, what they reveal is interesting but what they hide is vital". It makes so much more sense to look at these numbers with a perspective. A perspective would help us make sense out of these, otherwise these numbers will give us a false sense of security, a false sense of achievement. A billion Indians are obsessing with the records Tendulkar has made in his illustrious career. Records have so defined him that the day he doesn't score a century he is deemed a failure. Isn't it time we measure achievement by some other intangible parameters like commitment, passion, grit, determination. A number is no more than a number. From the board percentage in 10th and 12th, to JEE AIR to CAT percentile and then the salary the tendency to measure an individual with numbers is taking heavy toll on us. We need to stop this madness, this obsession, this objectivity in judging everyone. Or else we'll keep making records, records which don't matter, records which only say we can add, subtract, multiply and divide with amazing dexterity!

Racism!

"Mirror mirror upon the wall, who is the fairest of all?". So asked the queen once. The mirror answered-"Thou, O Queen, art the fairest of all". The story though seems completely out of context here, has a very important message. For years now Indians have been cribbing about how racism has affected the way they work in foreign land. How they are called Paki and the discrimination they have to face because of their nationality. Stories of Shilpa Shetty facing racial discrimination filled the tabloids for weeks. Before we feel sorry for ourselves one more time, isn't it time we reflect if we are part of the same ilk. How many times have we laughed at a sardar joke, or mocked at the girls from the east as 'chinki', laughed at the accent of people from the south and cleverly assumed the next girl from the states as "forward going"? How many times have we labeled a girl laughing with a bunch of guys as a slut. The truth is we are all the same. We are always looking for the mirror that calls us the fairest. TV commercials promote fair skin for all and sundry. Anyone who is not fair is touted as ugly and needs a "Fair & Lovely" or "Fair & Handsome" to look presentable. We are obsessed with fair skin. We have zero tolerance towards anyone who is remotely different from us, look wise, accent wise, region wise. So why this cribbing when we get a taste of our own medicine. So the next time before you buy yourself that 'whiteness cream' ask yourself if it changes anything inside you. The next time you feel bad about being called a bloody Indian, think of how many Indians you abused as sardars or chinkis. Think about it! The mirror needs to answer differently this time. It needs a different question!

That Match!!

For some strange things that have been going on in my life for the past few days, I have started reminiscing the good times. The good old days when everything was simple, uncomplicated and a lot of fun. The thought took me to one of the cricket match I had played when I was in class 7th. Now at that point of time in my life winning meant everything to me. It was fructification of all the effort and hard work I had put in. It was the vindication of my belief in my talent, my ability and myself. So coming back to the match it was between my team "The Warriors" and another local team whose name we never cared to remember. The team was furious and very methodical in its approach. They had a genuine fast bowler in Varun, an all rounder in Little and fantastic leg-spinner in Anupam, who was also the captain of the team. On the other hand our team consisted of bits and pieces players. We had players from the age group of 3 to 13, some who could barely walk. So we had quite a task in front of us.The team heavily depended on me and Ankit. We both called ourselves all-rounders, due to our ability to perform either with the ball or the bat, never both together. All we had was an insane belief in our self, a belief that we were the best! Anyway the match started sharp at the scheduled time which was 2:oo pm. It was a 15 over a side match. Anupam's team won the toss and chose to bat first. Today it was one of the typical bad bowling day for both Ankit and me. We got hit left right and center. The only consolation was that owing to our bad performance with the ball there was a chance that we would bat well. Anyway they scored 120 in their 15 overs and we required 121 in 15 overs at an asking rate of 8.07. It was a difficult task made even worse by the fact that Ankit was injured during the match. Ankit and our burly neighbour Deepak took guard. Now Deepak was the most important member of our team because it was his bat that was used by all. His scores never reached double digit in his entire career. But today was a new day. We had told him that a score of 10 from him will be heavily rewarded. As the rule of lbw wasn't there we told him to use his size to the advantage. Varun took his 25 metre un up and came speeding in, much to the discomfort of our trembling opener Deepak. Off went the ball only to kiss the bails . 0 for 1, hardly a score we needed. I walked with heavy booing in the background. It was me who had to perfrom, was the thought that ran into my mind. Ankit was anyway limping, so it had to be the aerial route today. It's said that in cricket there are some days when everything you do clicks, when every shot you take goes past the boundary line. That day was just one of those days. Soon Ankit and me were in full flow. Runs came thick and fast. We achieved the target in 9.1 overs and consequently won by 9 wickets and made a hefty profit of Rs.10 per member. It was the biggest victory and a moral boast like no other. Vishal the youngest member all of 3 years suggested we go and have cold-drinks.It was still an hour to go before it would be too dark to see. We decided that we wanted to practice, cos celebration could wait another day, we still have the finals to play. And we had to WIN because loosing was not an option!!!

Of CATs and dogs

18th Nov 2007 may have been the most important day in the lives of some lakhs of 20 somethings. You should stop reading if you are wondering what is so special about 18th Nov. You should continue reading if you think WHAT IS SO SPECIAL ABOUT 18th Nov. It was the day when lakhs of students looked for answers through questions, when thousands of coaching institutes tried to prove that there was a point to their existence. It was the day when all the parents who told their children that MBA is the career for them, queued outside the test centers. It was the day when a few failures will start the biggest success stories and the day when some 1500 odd people will start the biggest herd enroad to pots of money. Yes 18th November was the CAT day. So what's your score??

Blogging!!

Why blogging? Everyone seems to want an answer for this question. It seems weird to them that anyone would want his thoughts to be read by everyone. A dear friend even quoted "Good writers never write blogs", to which my stupid reply was "I'm not a good writer but a wannabe good writer and wannabe good writers always write blogs." But really "Why Blogging?"May be because it's so easy to start, makes you look in tune with time and is so en-vogue. Truthfully it's another 'What's the point' thing I asked myself to pick up every week. Why wouldn't I write to Annie instead. That's because I'm shamelessly commercial. At some level I want people to read it, love it, hate it, absorb it, reflect it or plainly ignore it!!! Take your pick!